test day

is finally over!

The last two years I've been preparing for this exam, the PANCE.  The last three weeks I've been reviewing questions, and more questions.  There were occasional breaks to play wii, eat, sleep, play the piano, and anything else I could do to distract myself.  It gets tedious reviewing material over and over again.  I had some great study partners that motivated me to keep going, most days.  My anxiety about the test (and the fact that it affects the rest of my future) has skyrocketed.  I have utilized the pharmaceutical companies goods with much appreciation.  

I hate standardized exams.  And this was the worst yet.  I arrived at 7:30 am.  This was a rigorous 6+ hour 360 question exam.  And very strict protocol.  To get in and out of the testing room you have to show ID and scan your fingerprint.  I had two 15 min breaks to use the restroom, drink some water, and eat some trailmix.  I had a small locker to store all my items.  Nothing is allowed in the testing room except your locker key and ID.  Intense.  Then I had to focus on taking six 60 question exams, one hour each.  I used every last minute.  Probably 25% of the questions I knew right away, 25% I think I knew, 25% I could narrow it down to two answers, and 25% I was purely guessing. Half of the questions, I don't even remember which answer I decided on.  Doesn't sound like such great odds.  Walking away from the testing center I felt complete dread.  The real torture is waiting to receive my results.  Not everyone passes.  

I finished at 2:40 pm. I was dehydrated, famished, and completely exhausted.  What to do while waiting???  I've never been so bored as I was yesterday.  I'm done studying, so how do you fill your time.  I tried to enjoy a sweet pork salad from Cafe Rio, but the questions kept running thru my mind.  Yes, I took time looking up things I wasn't sure about.  Not surprising, most of those questions I missed.  I couldn't even take a nap...which is NEVER the case.  I played the Wii, read some of my friends biography, played on the computer, played the piano, talked to my roommates... yet, I still had TOO much time to THINK about the exam.  I stayed up way too late.  And here it is way too early in the morning for me to be awake.  All I can do is wait, and think, and wait some more.